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Natural Born Mummy

Me and My Munchkin: Natural Born Mummy

Saturday, 31 March 2012

Natural Born Mummy

This was an unscheduled post, but it’s something that has been brought to my attention as an issue amongst a lot of mums, so I wanted to address it and find out just how many mums struggle with this. There are so many of us out there who worry throughout pregnancy about their ability to be a mother. We think that it should just come naturally, simply because we are women. When we see other mums out there who seem to take to motherhood like a duck to water it can get us down. Why do they seem to cope so well? They always seem to have a kiss and cuddle for their upset baby. Patience and the “right” discipline for their tantruming toddler. Endless time to sit and just ‘be’ with their child, all while the house remains relatively clean. They’re also the ones who you can also rely on to have in their nappy bag whatever it is that you’ve forgotten. They cope with the sleep deprivation so gracefully! You can’t help but wonder how motherhood comes so naturally to them, while you struggle with aspects of it.

After being an Aunt since the age of 10 and studying and working in child care, I thought that motherhood would come ever so naturally to me. Clearly what I wasn’t prepared for was the lack of sleep and rest. It’s been my biggest struggle since having my son. I don’t always know what to do. There are times when I have ring my family and friends (thank god for older sisters!) and ask them what I should do in such-and-such situation. As a mum we’re told to just listen to our baby and they’ll tell us what to do. Well I’m sorry but when you have a screaming baby at 2am, and you’ve already changed the nappy, tried to feed, tried to burp, ruled out them being too hot or cold, and you still can’t get them to stop screaming, knowing what is wrong with your baby simply because they’re your child feels like an impossibility.

Something that I’ve picked up along the way is that every mum has their struggles. Some mums are fine with sleep deprivation, but cannot handle tantrums. Some are fine with dealing with their toddlers’ independence but can’t cope with a sick, clingy child. And that’s ok! We are not Super Mums. And motherhood doesn’t come “naturally” to everyone. Still, that doesn’t stop us from feeling a little inadequate at times, and that’s ok too. We can’t feel confident and happy 100% of the time. Something that I’ve read a few times and think applies to this situation and is “don’t compare your behind-the-scenes to someone else’s highlights reel’.

Motherhood is full of ups and downs. You are not always going to know what is wrong with your child and how to fix it. That friend of a friend who appears to have it all together and cope with it all has her moments of insecurities too. We all need to remind each other of what a great mummy we are. Call up your best friend and tell her how great she is. You might just make her day.

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At 5 April 2012 at 07:16 , Anonymous Tubbah86 said...

Love this post, it's so true :) Definitely what I needed to read right now, thanks :)

At 5 April 2012 at 07:34 , Anonymous meandmymunchkin said...

You are more than welcome :) This something that at times, I struggle to come to terms with, and would like other mums out there to know that they are not alone, and none of us are perfect at this role.


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